In my opinion one third of the town I live in should be in flames. Silly town and its silly ways.
I handed my notice in at work. I love my job, but its just time.x
Wednesday 28 February 2007
Sunday 25 February 2007
Bottles and Bottles
"Good evening. What you doing in my bed."
Last night was Bobby Griffbags sisters birthday. So I got all dressed up. I looked sharp. I had a few beers and a hit flask. And I was off. I dropped Bobby and Jamie at the party. Then took the ol' car back home and started walking to the party with the crew. Necking beers, telling jokes and passing around a bottle of whiskey. The life.
Once at the party, the birthday girl looked stunning. I told her this. Her Dad bought me a drink. A pint. Looked around the party, thought about sex a bit. All pretty standard. Some young blond apparently digged me. I didn't really care though. I was too busy thinking "hey this finishes at 12, we need to get more booze". So we ran off and got some wine from sainsburys. Shouted at a baldy Secuity guard and checked out a hot cashier.
One quarter wasted. The party was getting better. People were getting tipsy and I had more nerve juice in me. The crew had stashed some booze outside. So every now and then we would sneak in a sip of whiskey. Yum. But after a while we got busted and it got put behind the bar. It burns to be broke and it hurts to be heartbroken. So I got on the phone to a young very good looking lady called Chrissie. With the best body I have ever been in. I told her to come down and she did.
Half Wasted. Party was near over and some guys didn't like the look of me. As per usual, the idiot crew. "we like drinking wkds and getting in fights". Nothing happened. Just sly comments. I hit the dance floor. Thats when I know on my way. Poorly and bluntly hit on some doll. Then went and talked to chrissie. Forced back more drinks. Woah
Three Quarters wasted. Party was over. Bobby, Chrissie and Jamie got a lift back to Jamies for the after party. We got into a small fight with some guy with crutches. Who was fighting his other mates. Broke a bottle of whiskey damn. I bundled in a car and got a lift to Jamies. Dazza and the rest of the crew got a taxi.
Fully Wasted. Oh my word. Off came the clothes. After a failed attempt of a threesome with Bobby and Chrissie, I went upstairs and passed out in some bed. "Good evening. What you doing in my bed." You soon I thought. Unfortunatley it was just a thought. As I was to drunk for sex. But I got a pretty good hand job and rolled over and passed out.
I woke up and grabbed a bottle of wine. It was 9 AM. Rolled into where Chrissie and Bobby was sleeping. The door was off the hinges. I sang them a song to get them up. Oh my Chrissie is hot. I jumped into bed with them. Pushed Bobby out and lay with that hot piece for a while, sipping red wine. Dazza was still here yay. Him and Jamie joined us. And I was drunk again at 10pm. A couple of bottles of red wine for breakfast. Oh my Chrissie is hot. The colour of my teeth . matched the colour of my tongue. Oh my Chrissie is hot. Just wearing a pair of french knickers and a top. Oh my Chrissie is hot. I spilt red wine down my bare chest. What a mess I am. A sexy mess though.
Last night was Bobby Griffbags sisters birthday. So I got all dressed up. I looked sharp. I had a few beers and a hit flask. And I was off. I dropped Bobby and Jamie at the party. Then took the ol' car back home and started walking to the party with the crew. Necking beers, telling jokes and passing around a bottle of whiskey. The life.
Once at the party, the birthday girl looked stunning. I told her this. Her Dad bought me a drink. A pint. Looked around the party, thought about sex a bit. All pretty standard. Some young blond apparently digged me. I didn't really care though. I was too busy thinking "hey this finishes at 12, we need to get more booze". So we ran off and got some wine from sainsburys. Shouted at a baldy Secuity guard and checked out a hot cashier.
One quarter wasted. The party was getting better. People were getting tipsy and I had more nerve juice in me. The crew had stashed some booze outside. So every now and then we would sneak in a sip of whiskey. Yum. But after a while we got busted and it got put behind the bar. It burns to be broke and it hurts to be heartbroken. So I got on the phone to a young very good looking lady called Chrissie. With the best body I have ever been in. I told her to come down and she did.
Half Wasted. Party was near over and some guys didn't like the look of me. As per usual, the idiot crew. "we like drinking wkds and getting in fights". Nothing happened. Just sly comments. I hit the dance floor. Thats when I know on my way. Poorly and bluntly hit on some doll. Then went and talked to chrissie. Forced back more drinks. Woah
Three Quarters wasted. Party was over. Bobby, Chrissie and Jamie got a lift back to Jamies for the after party. We got into a small fight with some guy with crutches. Who was fighting his other mates. Broke a bottle of whiskey damn. I bundled in a car and got a lift to Jamies. Dazza and the rest of the crew got a taxi.
Fully Wasted. Oh my word. Off came the clothes. After a failed attempt of a threesome with Bobby and Chrissie, I went upstairs and passed out in some bed. "Good evening. What you doing in my bed." You soon I thought. Unfortunatley it was just a thought. As I was to drunk for sex. But I got a pretty good hand job and rolled over and passed out.
I woke up and grabbed a bottle of wine. It was 9 AM. Rolled into where Chrissie and Bobby was sleeping. The door was off the hinges. I sang them a song to get them up. Oh my Chrissie is hot. I jumped into bed with them. Pushed Bobby out and lay with that hot piece for a while, sipping red wine. Dazza was still here yay. Him and Jamie joined us. And I was drunk again at 10pm. A couple of bottles of red wine for breakfast. Oh my Chrissie is hot. The colour of my teeth . matched the colour of my tongue. Oh my Chrissie is hot. Just wearing a pair of french knickers and a top. Oh my Chrissie is hot. I spilt red wine down my bare chest. What a mess I am. A sexy mess though.
Thursday 22 February 2007
It's a Curse
"This is the happiest I have felt with someone for a long time." She said. Long pause.
"I'm not doing this to be a bitch."
"Ok." Funny I didn't believe her.
Oh, look at those lovers. It's not only going to be just a kiss. As this ponders on my mind, I realise that I will not sleep tonight, no sleep, no sleep, not till its light. I need someone elses heart. This ones on fire.
"I'm not doing this to be a bitch."
"Ok." Funny I didn't believe her.
Oh, look at those lovers. It's not only going to be just a kiss. As this ponders on my mind, I realise that I will not sleep tonight, no sleep, no sleep, not till its light. I need someone elses heart. This ones on fire.
Monday 19 February 2007
In and Out and Over
I awakened in a bed next to Bobby Griffbag. "So it happened, again?" said I. "Yep". Picked myself up grabbed my shoes and headed down stairs. This is the bit where I piece it all together.
The phone rang again. "You going to that party?".
"I heard about it. Sounds shit and I kind of got other plans"
"oh come be fun."
"ok for a little while then."
So got Dazza then went to the party on the hill. Soon as we got to the hill we could tell which one was the party. Parked the car and walked over to the house. Screaming and shouting everywhere we bundled through the door. Drunken teens everywhere. It was a sea of cliches. Long side parted hair, ear tunnels, tight black shirts and worn blue jeans. Boring, this is going to be a substandard party.
Luke was in the garden , but we had to avoid seeing some guy, cause I had mutilated his house bit. So went back out the front door and through the gate to the garden. Once in the garden, the party host announced that the party was over. Some girl had been bottled round the face. So Dazza poached some beer and we were off, to the orignal party that I had planned.
We was now at Jambos party and we had bought a few friends with us. Champagne time I feel. Dazza had been wonderful and supplied me with the good stuff. Whiskey, white wine, red wine, champagne and beer. I love champagne. Soon as it touches my tongue, it makes me feel charged.
My plan tonight was to get liqoured up. And by god had I achieved it now. I was in the bathroom with a young brunette, who I had apparently been with before.
"Your tongues cold. Last time I kissed you it was"
" No its not. I'll prove it. "
At it again. If only I could take you through this story more clearly. After a while, I was done with this lady of pleasure. I went downstairs and headed into a another room.
"Dan take off your clothes and me and lexie will have a threesome with you."
Off came the shirt. Then I paused. Thought wait a second. Then after thinking, I realised my trousers were off . She had continued to take off the rest of my clothes.
Off I ran through the house. Just in my underwear. I polished off a bottle of wine and fell up the stairs.
I awakened in a bed next to Bobby Griffbag.
The phone rang again. "You going to that party?".
"I heard about it. Sounds shit and I kind of got other plans"
"oh come be fun."
"ok for a little while then."
So got Dazza then went to the party on the hill. Soon as we got to the hill we could tell which one was the party. Parked the car and walked over to the house. Screaming and shouting everywhere we bundled through the door. Drunken teens everywhere. It was a sea of cliches. Long side parted hair, ear tunnels, tight black shirts and worn blue jeans. Boring, this is going to be a substandard party.
Luke was in the garden , but we had to avoid seeing some guy, cause I had mutilated his house bit. So went back out the front door and through the gate to the garden. Once in the garden, the party host announced that the party was over. Some girl had been bottled round the face. So Dazza poached some beer and we were off, to the orignal party that I had planned.
We was now at Jambos party and we had bought a few friends with us. Champagne time I feel. Dazza had been wonderful and supplied me with the good stuff. Whiskey, white wine, red wine, champagne and beer. I love champagne. Soon as it touches my tongue, it makes me feel charged.
My plan tonight was to get liqoured up. And by god had I achieved it now. I was in the bathroom with a young brunette, who I had apparently been with before.
"Your tongues cold. Last time I kissed you it was"
" No its not. I'll prove it. "
At it again. If only I could take you through this story more clearly. After a while, I was done with this lady of pleasure. I went downstairs and headed into a another room.
"Dan take off your clothes and me and lexie will have a threesome with you."
Off came the shirt. Then I paused. Thought wait a second. Then after thinking, I realised my trousers were off . She had continued to take off the rest of my clothes.
Off I ran through the house. Just in my underwear. I polished off a bottle of wine and fell up the stairs.
I awakened in a bed next to Bobby Griffbag.
Wednesday 14 February 2007
Did I Ever Tell You?
I'm waiting for a some make up sex and another fresh start. Perhaps one day we can....? Nevermind.
Tonight I am laying in a guillotine. I haven't even missed a breath waiting for the suspended heavy blade. I tryed my hardest to cry but it wouldn't come. "Lie still and close your eyes" I hear them bark. I'm too proud to close my eyes and I will not be kicking and screaming. Screeeech!
Chop.
Strange few days. Monday, I was in Town, sucking on cheap alcopops, to get me into a better state of mind. Good job it doesn't take many. Few hours pass, my hips have done enough grinding and my train is soon. I fumble down to the train station with a few that I know are coming back my way. We had missed the last train. "Taxi".
Don't know how it happend, but I ended up in bed, holding hands and kissing a young lady with a certain appeal. She was a good kisser but her lips were dry. Probally because of the alcohol we had both consumed. We layed together for a few hours, till I decided she was in my way and I didn't feel comfortable no longer. I took her home and regretted, not giving her a goodbye kiss.
It was now 6am and I had work in an hour. I'm not going. I lay in bed watching the ceiling spin until I fell asleep, only to wake up a few seconds later to call in sick. I did nothing for the rest of the day. Just lay there. I felt uncomfortable. So I took all my clothes off.
Then today was harder. I didn't want to leave my bed. Then after I did, I found out the road was slippery. So I dreamnt about driving into oncoming cars or wrecking myself into a lamp posts. Finally got to work and my day got better. I didnt eat much. I just wanted to go home. So I rushed through most of the day and bunked the last hour in starbucks with the hip kids. I then felt like getting wrecked. I brought this up in the conversation. Got out of work quick. Drove as fast as possible home.
Later that night. I watched the Arsenal game. Which we won. Then got a phone call. Bad news. Go fetch the knife I won't be needing one of my organs no more.
Tonight I am laying in a guillotine. I haven't even missed a breath waiting for the suspended heavy blade. I tryed my hardest to cry but it wouldn't come. "Lie still and close your eyes" I hear them bark. I'm too proud to close my eyes and I will not be kicking and screaming. Screeeech!
Chop.
Strange few days. Monday, I was in Town, sucking on cheap alcopops, to get me into a better state of mind. Good job it doesn't take many. Few hours pass, my hips have done enough grinding and my train is soon. I fumble down to the train station with a few that I know are coming back my way. We had missed the last train. "Taxi".
Don't know how it happend, but I ended up in bed, holding hands and kissing a young lady with a certain appeal. She was a good kisser but her lips were dry. Probally because of the alcohol we had both consumed. We layed together for a few hours, till I decided she was in my way and I didn't feel comfortable no longer. I took her home and regretted, not giving her a goodbye kiss.
It was now 6am and I had work in an hour. I'm not going. I lay in bed watching the ceiling spin until I fell asleep, only to wake up a few seconds later to call in sick. I did nothing for the rest of the day. Just lay there. I felt uncomfortable. So I took all my clothes off.
Then today was harder. I didn't want to leave my bed. Then after I did, I found out the road was slippery. So I dreamnt about driving into oncoming cars or wrecking myself into a lamp posts. Finally got to work and my day got better. I didnt eat much. I just wanted to go home. So I rushed through most of the day and bunked the last hour in starbucks with the hip kids. I then felt like getting wrecked. I brought this up in the conversation. Got out of work quick. Drove as fast as possible home.
Later that night. I watched the Arsenal game. Which we won. Then got a phone call. Bad news. Go fetch the knife I won't be needing one of my organs no more.
Monday 12 February 2007
Raise Your Drink High
It could have been worst. Sipping cranberry juice, lamb in the slow cooker and plenty of 90s science fiction television shows, to take me through to wednesday. But instead, I went into town.
At first I expected a brawl. Guys running out of shops, with staplers to beat me down to a bloody pulp. I was told a rumour today that I was to be found, chucked into a white van and have my knee caps dealt with. Of course I laughed at this. But it had put me a little bit on edge. You see, in my previous adventures, I have drank champagne and indulged into breaking a few things before being escorted to a car and taken home in MI5 fashion. So i can understand, why i have made a few enemies. But I have made many more allies. Which is so odd. I have a small cult, ready to break stuff, on my command.
Then I got my swagger on. Walked through the town like it was my castle. Yeah I had found my crown. The King has returned. "Bring me the finest wine in the land. No one is getting sober till its all devoured. You hear me!" I walked around greeted some of the finest folk in the land.
So then I went shopping. Or the lack of. Couldn't see a single garment. I wondered round talking to the nifty sales lady for a while before leaving.
Then it happened. Who was it, but the fair maiden. A quick awkward conversation, made me realise that my throne was no more. I was on my knees and before long, I took off my crown and gave it to her. I offered her my sword to do as she wish. But luckily I was spared. Don't worry the conversation got better and before long she abdicated. I had remembered. She is with a jester and has no real power in my Kingdom. "Off with her head". I snatched my crown back and left with my head high. "Fetch me my horse." Over the hill I rode...
At first I expected a brawl. Guys running out of shops, with staplers to beat me down to a bloody pulp. I was told a rumour today that I was to be found, chucked into a white van and have my knee caps dealt with. Of course I laughed at this. But it had put me a little bit on edge. You see, in my previous adventures, I have drank champagne and indulged into breaking a few things before being escorted to a car and taken home in MI5 fashion. So i can understand, why i have made a few enemies. But I have made many more allies. Which is so odd. I have a small cult, ready to break stuff, on my command.
Then I got my swagger on. Walked through the town like it was my castle. Yeah I had found my crown. The King has returned. "Bring me the finest wine in the land. No one is getting sober till its all devoured. You hear me!" I walked around greeted some of the finest folk in the land.
So then I went shopping. Or the lack of. Couldn't see a single garment. I wondered round talking to the nifty sales lady for a while before leaving.
Then it happened. Who was it, but the fair maiden. A quick awkward conversation, made me realise that my throne was no more. I was on my knees and before long, I took off my crown and gave it to her. I offered her my sword to do as she wish. But luckily I was spared. Don't worry the conversation got better and before long she abdicated. I had remembered. She is with a jester and has no real power in my Kingdom. "Off with her head". I snatched my crown back and left with my head high. "Fetch me my horse." Over the hill I rode...
The End
Sunday 11 February 2007
Medicine Makes Friends
Medicine makes friends. It's so interesting to find out two guys sharing their problems could be the start of a fantastic relationship. Guess liking the same little skirt, could be a problem. What a messed up world this is. I sat here for hours, with a kind of comfort. He had failed. Although I know what that tootsie is like. Confused, very foolish and hopeless. It's nice to found out she still talks about me. Even if its a barrage of curses. Love never hurt us. Just tore us apart.
I've been so confused lately that I barely know my own needs and wants. I have woke up, with countless numbers of the fairer sex and none of them matter when they are laying next to me. Well maybe a couple."NO MORE" I scream inside. I make out they are painkillers. But lately my painkillers have been making the pain worse.
Raise your hands if you want to go on a liquor run. I wish I had more hands. Damn, I need a clumsy, young and awkward lover tonight.
I've been so confused lately that I barely know my own needs and wants. I have woke up, with countless numbers of the fairer sex and none of them matter when they are laying next to me. Well maybe a couple."NO MORE" I scream inside. I make out they are painkillers. But lately my painkillers have been making the pain worse.
Raise your hands if you want to go on a liquor run. I wish I had more hands. Damn, I need a clumsy, young and awkward lover tonight.
Burning In Water, Drowning In Flames
I pulled myself out from underneath the water. I had been under for quite some time, just pretending to drown. Grabbed a towel, walked over to the mirror and rubbed off the remains of the dryed red wine on my lips. So whos that haggered guy over there? Oh, thats a mirror.
Who am I kidding i've never looked so good.
So then I grabbed my pants off the floor and walked into my stinky love nest. Looked at a video on my camera. It was a friend urinating on my car, from last night.
"we need to get some" person a
*pause*
"bitches and hoes, bitches and hoes" person b
"I was going to say beers." person a
Then paranoia kicked in and I wondered if she had kept her knickers above her ankles last night. She was a great kisser, a great dancer and I actually enjoyed her company. Its a shame she wasn't at all that great of a girlfriend.
FIRST POST
Who am I kidding i've never looked so good.
So then I grabbed my pants off the floor and walked into my stinky love nest. Looked at a video on my camera. It was a friend urinating on my car, from last night.
"we need to get some" person a
*pause*
"bitches and hoes, bitches and hoes" person b
"I was going to say beers." person a
Then paranoia kicked in and I wondered if she had kept her knickers above her ankles last night. She was a great kisser, a great dancer and I actually enjoyed her company. Its a shame she wasn't at all that great of a girlfriend.
FIRST POST
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